Sunday, March 19

Shock Value

My mom called the other day all excited about a book she had read. Now, this in and of itself is rather surprising, because mom rarely remembers a book after she's finished it, but this one stuck with her.

Mom: Have you ever read Sue Margolis?
Me: No, but the name sound familiar.
Mom: I just finished Apocalipstick
Me: I've heard of that, it's a British Chick Lit, isn't it?
Mom: I knew it had a name, Chick Lit, I like that. I just love that British humor. Can you try finding me some more at that bookstore you go to?
Me: Sure.
Mom: I'll save you this one you're going to love it, the story sucked, but it's too funny.

Excuse me, the story sucked, but it's too funny? We were over at mom's on St. Patrick's Day for dinner, she handed over the book and wanted to know when I was going to the UBS. Soon, I promise.

So, I start reading it yesterday.

Hit the scene in the sex shop when the heroine buys a sex toy to shut up her best friend and then announces, said sex toy did it's job in 2 minutes. And, I'm thinking --OMG, mommy read this.

I keep reading, come to the "toe f***ing" scene in the restaurant, And, I'm thinking --OMG, my mom read this.

And then I hit the scene where the best friend's husband is screwing a blow up doll, and I'm thinking --Holy Crap, my mother read this.

I'm thinking this is the same woman who skips sex scenes in romances because "once you've read one, you've read them all", and, then it hit me, for most of my life my parents had a bawdy, for shock value, sense of humor.

My brother's nickname growing up was Nature Boy, he was conceived outside and they had no problem telling people this. Personally, I never found it all that shocking, hey, it was the 60's, man. I always found it much more disturbing that he was conceived the night they saw Rosemary's Baby.

For years that bawdy sense of humor was directed at 2 people. My sister and my husband. Not that my husband didn't appreciate that type of humor, to be honest, he could probably put them to shame, he was just shocked to see someone's parents behaving this way. He's never seen his parents kiss, he's 47. He picked me up one night and asked "Where are you're parents?" My response, "in the shower." ""Together?" Well, he was shocked, not that they were in the shower, but that I knew it.

As a teenager, my poor sister had absolutely no sense of humor, and my parents tormented her. Every dinner ended with some racy comment that sent her scurrying back to her room. This continued long after she was married and my sister, would roll her eyes and purse her lips, but she never said anything.

About 10 years ago, the folks were teasing her at a family dinner when she turned the tables on them. My mom said something that has been lost to time, but my sister put down her fork and went into an imitation of my mother in what can only be described as "the throes of passion" (think Meg Ryan) that must have been pretty accurate as my mother spent the next 5 minutes hyperventilating over the kitchen sink. It seems the walls in our house were much thinner than they thought and my poor sister had the bedroom next to them.

No more bawdy, risque comments were ever uttered at a family dinner.

I guess, mom hasn't lost that shock value sense of humor. I'll try to find her some more this week.

Have a good one, and happy reading.

Tara

10 comments:

Kristie (J) said...

What a hilarious glimpse into your family :) Doesn't it throw you for a loop when someone in your family does something totally unexpected?

Tara Marie said...

Kristie,

I don't know which is more shocking, that my mom loved a book with a "toe f***ing* scene or my sister Academy Award scene at dinner that night.

My sister has a great sense of humor--all things considered I guess it was understandable that she went through the "my parents are an embarrassment" stage longer than the rest of us.

CindyS said...

OMG!! I would have fainted if I knew my parents were in the shower together!

When Bob and I renovated our upstairs bathroom we put the faucet for the tub on the side wall so when in together, no one had the spiget in their back. I guess my Dad asked Bob why the spout was where it was and the bloody ass told him. Thank God I wasn't in the room!

My parents get wiggy if they see us kiss, 'get a room!' is the usual comment or 'hey, I'm in the room with you!'.

Good for your sister though, that's friggin' hilarious.

CindyS

ReneeW said...

OMG, this is so hilarious! When I was 20 and dating Bob, he was trying to talk me into having sex (of course) and mentioned that my parents had sex. WHAT?!? NO!! My parent don't do THAT!. I. was. shocked. It is hard to see our parents as sexual beings.

Jay said...

LOLOLOL! That is too funny! I've only read Neurotica and I never finished it. That kinda turned me off Margolis, but I was young though, so maybe I should give her another try.

Renee, Bob must have been desparate if he was bringing up your parents ;) who wants to think about that when you're trying to get it on?!

ReneeW said...

Jay, hehehe, his argument was that EVERYBODY does it, even parents. He was throwing in every argument he could think of, but I was a hard sell. I was very naive and stubborn. But he persisted and the rest is history. :)

Tara Marie said...

Cindy--my husbands been involved with my family long enough that he'd have told the truth about hte faucet too.

Renee--I think that was my husbands problem, he was creeped out by the thought of his parents having sex.

Jay--My mom asked me today about the book. I told her I made it to the blow up doll scene and gave, her response, finish the book, it's funny, but the author does have a preoccupation with "vaginas".

Sam said...

That is SO funny - and the book sounds hysterical.
I love all the Wilt books, and English humor is so fun. (although I did read one English chick lit book that put me to sleep)
And I love Philippa Gregory. Well, we'll see!

Tara Marie said...

Sam--I probably would have enjoyed it more, if I wasn't preoccupied with the fact my mom had read it, and loved it--LOL.

Anonymous said...

Best regards from NY!
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